Nature’s candy is crap!
I don’t know what Halloween was like for you, but for me it was the most scenic stretch along the road to child obesity. I quickly ditched the tiny plastic pumpkin to collect my candy for a larger, more pliable king-sized pillow case. I had two goals for the night. 1 - fill the pillow case with candy. 2 - transfer as much candy as possible directly into my stomach via my mouth before the clock struck November.
I don’t have kids of my own, so I don’t really understand what makes kids tick these days on Halloween, but I had to believe that their goals were similar to mine. I was blown away this past weekend to see kids “choosing” healthy food options over real life candy. I saw kids with Clif Bars, Luna Bars and Emergen-C. It really was appauling. I pulled a teenager aside to ask if this is what it was like when she was a kid and she confirmed that this has been going on in Boulder for years. No wonder we don’t have any fat kids to make fun of…its horrible. I feel like I wouldn’t be the person I am today if Chuck Parks hadn’t consistently referred to me as Mountain Butt throughout elementary school. I guess I just don’t want these beautiful young children to miss out on this type of mockery. Children of Boulder…I ask you to pick up that apple, find the house that handed it to you, throw it at their mailbox, eat all of the candy that you were able to hold onto, and enjoy the hell out of that hypoglycemic coma.
Adam is Jess. Jess is Adam. Up is Down. Black is White…
Wild Sage Trick or Treaters
Raisin? No…is a Rambutan.
Halloween party at Nick and Karin’s